Good evening, Beloved Readers. Ever had a question that nagged at you? A question that demanded an answer, and like now? Yet in all your searching, you find there’s no answer?
Welcome to tonight’s post. Tonight, I’m talking about questions without answers. When things happen and there are no logical, clear cut answers to be found. These mysteries happen all the time in our lives and plague us to no end.
Even in the church we don’t like the thought of questions without answers. We want God to sort them out quickly. God’s supposed to be omniscient (all-knowing), so then God is supposed to give an answer when we ask for it. We ask our clergy for answers-maybe God gave them the answers-only to find they can answer our questions themselves.
When Carrington passed, my wife Crystal and I had questions for God on why our beloved son was snatched so early in life. We had questions in our prayers and in our thoughts. Even while I write this, the questions nag at me.
However, I grew to realize that not every question is going to have an answer. There are mysteries we will not solve. This, I am learning, is part of spiritual maturity. God may not right away-or never-answer our questions. It’s not that God is being mean-no.
I believe that God won’t give us answers, because we couldn’t handle the answers if we were to find them. Some answers are above our current understanding and could floor us if we got the answers. We may have to wait until we mature more spiritually, or after we transition back to God.
I also believe that God won’t answer our questions, because the question itself will help us grow. Questions can drive us to more questions that will develop our spiritual muscles so we can live our lives fully. Not every question begs an answer; not every mystery needs be solved. It’s these situations that grow us up and expand our minds and spirits. I believe we get to that level of spiritual maturity where we become comfortable having questions without answers.
In our spiritual roadtrip, let’s get comfortable having questions without answers. It may be the “answer” we’re looking for.
Peace!
Image: Branch Brook Park, Newark, NJ. March 24, 2024.
You know why I still can go to church even though I’m still grieving? Even though I cannot see our son, Carrington in worship service? What strength God puts in me to go?
It’s the people. When I go to Sunday worship, I go to see my fellow church members. The sermons are good, however how many times can you use a certain passage of scripture? And I do enjoy the choir, whether I’m singing on a particular Sunday or not. However, it’s the people who I want to see.
You see, my fellow members and I have stories. You got that right: stories. We in the fellowship have stories-both collectively as well as individually. We have a shared story of being the recipients of God’s lavish loving grace through Their Christ. That we are all part of the Divine Realm in which we share s common link. We have stores in the church as far as joint ministries, activities in the life of our fellowship, shared joys, and shared pains.
We also have stores outside the church as well. I have a couple of stories I share with members that predate my joining. Stories transcend time and space. Stories are a shared connection we have with each other, whether it’s with one person or the whole congregation. You, my Beloved Readers, have read my stories over the years on this blog; as I’ve read your stories on your blogs!
I dare to say I prefer stories over sermons! As I said earlier, how many times can you wring a message out of scripture text (take it from blogging experience)? In fact, scripture can be static and dead at times. If we’re honest with ourselves, how many times a sermon just didn’t cut it thanks to some anachronistic passage of scripture?
However, our stories are fluid and alive. Our stories are relevant to ourselves, and possibly to each other. Our shared stories are a bond that brings us together in ways that scripture sometimes can’t. Coming from the perspective of a Black American male living in the first half of the 21st Century CE, I have my stories that are unique to me. Yet I can share my stories while listening to others share their stories with me.
Public Service Announcement: WE ALL HAVE STORIES!!!
As I wrote on Palm Sunday 2023:
I’d rather hear each other’s stories and engage each other (thank you Karl Forehand). I’m like David Hayward’s t-shirt that reads “Love Over Verses.” I wish that we’d close our Bibles and empty our pulpits; coming together in engaging fellowship, telling and hearing our stories in a healing and welcoming environment.
I believe if we took my above advice, we would have real fellowship. Give me stories from the heart (over sermons from the head) In keeping with this year’s themes, our stories can foster Healing and Forgiveness among us-allowing us to live the Wild Divine Creative Erotic life in Love and Courage through the Christ that lives in us.
So, in keeping with tonight’s question: What’s Your Story?
Peace!
*Image: Gallery Aferro in Newark, NJ. May 20, 2023.
Jesus said to his disciples, “As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you; abide in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. I have said these things to you so that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be complete.
“This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. I do not call you servants any longer, because the servant does not know what the master is doing; but I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything that I have heard from my Father. You did not choose me but I chose you. And I appointed you to go and bear fruit, fruit that will last, so that the Father will give you whatever you ask him in my name. I am giving you these commands so that you may love one another.”
John 15:9-17 (Revised Standard Version)
Good morning Beloved Readers. Today is the first Sunday after Easter. It is also the first Sunday in April, which is Communion Sunday. I am going to draw on my Maundy Thursday post, “In Search of Communion” as a jump off point for today’s post. In that post, I spoke about the need for communion in today’s church and world. I spoke about the church’s cheapening Communion into a lifeless ritual far from what Jesus initiated on the night he was betrayed.
Today’s scripture text takes place during the Passover Seder-the “Last Supper” as the church calls it. We see Jesus, who knew that the Powers That Be were closing in on him, giving final instructions to his people. The first was for the disciples to live out Jesus’s teachings they received so they can abide in his love just as Jesus lived out The Parent’s teachings and abided in Their love. Jesus assured that such a life would result in joyful living.
However, it was Jesus’s next instruction that really hit home: to loveone another. Not, just to love one another, but to love to the point of laying down one’s life for another if necessary. It is that love which Jesus related to his disciples as friends more than servants. Plus, this love (and with Divine help) that will empower the disciples to live the Christ life and “bear fruit”-empower others to live the Christ life as well.
Love is known as the “ The Greatest Commandment.” As Jesus taught in Matthew 22:34-40. Here, Jesus teaches that we are to love God first and foremost with our whole being; and then love each other as we love ourselves. However, I have to be honest and say this commandment might as well be called, “The Hardest Commandment,” since we don’t follow this commandment as we could.
I call Love “The Hardest Commandment” because we-including me-don’t follow this commandment. If you look at us in the church, you sadly see hatred towards “others” and each other. We don’t love as we could. And if you were to visit today’s Communion services, you could see people who just tolerate each other. And love God? Forget it. We have a love-hate relationship with the Divine, who we treat more like furniture than the Source of All. I say we treat God like a piece of furniture because we don’t think on God unless They serve some use to us-like furniture.
I spoke of the loss of communion in our churches and in our society; now we see why: no love. Love is a hard commandment. Loving the Divine who we cannot see can be a stretch for us-even for Christians. Loving those who may not appreciate, reciprocate, or deserve our love is a challenge. Love is a hard commandment when we’re called to say “No,” or worse, let go. Loving ourselves fully is hard since we have created facades that we wear all day, seeking validation from the outside. The love commandment is hard and reaches into our communions, where we put on facades and “like” each other. We’ve turned our communities into just masses of people: no love, no joy.
And we wonder why people are leaving the church and the world doesn’t take us seriously. We’ve been weakened by the lack of love that we cannot fully live the Christ life, nor can we empower others to do the same.
Love is “The Hardest Commandment,” however you see Jesus putting such a great emphasis on it for us to follow. Methinks God is trying to tell us something.
That’s all for now my friends. Just something for us to think on today and down the road.
Peace.
Image: East Long Branch, New Jersey. November 4, 2023.
even when we were dead through our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up with him, and made us sit with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus,
Ephesians 2:5-6
A Happy and Blessed Resurrection Day! Today we celebrate Christ’s resurrection from the dead.
Whatever your take on this story, it’s a story that gives us hope. It’s the blessed hope that death isn’t the final end. It’s a hope that Jesus is alivetoday. Despite the fact that Jesus died a horrible death and was buried in a borrowed tomb. Despite the fact that the powers that be thought they shut Jesus up for good.
However, that wasn’t the case. After three days dead, Jesus flipped Death and Hell the ultimate bird. We have been freed from the fear and oppression of Death. We have the blessed hope of life eternal. A life that transcends time and dimension. When we die here in this Universe, we won’t stay dead. No, the story won’t end at our graves; this isn’t the end. We will live beyond death with God. We will reunite with loved ones that have gone on before. Most important, we will be fully one with God, eternal in the pure Divine Realm.
Plus, Jesus’s resurrection put the smackdown on sin. Sin has no eternal power on humanity. We are now free to live the Wild Divine Creative Erotic higher and ultimate life through the risen living Christ that lives in us!
Today let’s celebrate Resurrection Day, and rejoice in the hope we have in Christ Jesus!
When it was evening, there came a rich man from Arimathea, named Joseph, who was also a disciple of Jesus. He went to Pilate and asked for the body of Jesus; then Pilate ordered it to be given to him. So Joseph took the body and wrapped it in a clean linen cloth and laid it in his own new tomb, which he had hewn in the rock. He then rolled a great stone to the door of the tomb and went away. Mary Magdalene and the other Mary were there, sitting opposite the tomb.
The next day, that is, after the day of Preparation, the chief priests and the Pharisees gathered before Pilate and said, “Sir, we remember what that impostor said while he was still alive, `After three days I will rise again.’ Therefore command the tomb to be made secure until the third day; otherwise his disciples may go and steal him away, and tell the people, `He has been raised from the dead,’ and the last deception would be worse than the first.” Pilate said to them, “You have a guard of soldiers; go, make it as secure as you can.” So they went with the guard and made the tomb secure by sealing the stone.
Matthew 27:57-66 (New Revised Standard Version)
Today is Holy Saturday-the day the Church observes as being the interim period between the crucifixion and the resurrection; between Good Friday and Easter (Resurrection) Sunday. In other Church traditions, it’s a time of vigil marked by scripture readings as the faithful await Easter.
This interim time is a nebulous one for the characters of today’s scripture. For the two Marys, it was a striking blow to their spirits seeing their beloved rabbi being executed by the horrific crucifixion. How would their families endure the shame of being related to a State criminal.
For the disciples, it was a nebulous time as they locked themselves for fear that they’d be next on the crucifixion “dance card” (ref. John 20:19) after Jesus.
Even for Jesus’s enemies it was a nebulous time. The chief priests and Pharisees were concerned that Jesus’s disciples would steal his body as “proof” of his rising after three days prophecy. Such a stunt would be a political and religious nightmare for these cats. Pilate assuaged their fears by posting a detail of soldiers and had the tomb entry sealed.
The interim after a traumatic event is nebulous for those of us experiencing it-take it from first-hand experience. The interim is a time where all we thought was normal just got jumbled and scattered about. All of a sudden, the language of our life’s meaning just got changed completely. The interim is a period where grief, uncertainty, and even apprehension plague us like hearing strange sounds while being alone at night in a dark wood or deserted city street.
None of us like this interim, yet it is a part of life. In our quest for a life of meaning, the nebulous is an unwelcome guest. We often want things to go our way and to be safely predictable. However, our text for today reminds us that we will have trying times in our lives, and afterwards comes the nebulous interim.
However, despite all the above, God’s in control. And although we cannot see the final outcome when we come out of the interim, we will be better.
For now, welcome to the interim.
Peace.
Image: Along I-81 in Pennsylvania. December 24, 2023.
Scripture reference: the Death and Burial of Jesus.
Today is Good Friday 2024. This is the day the Church commemorates the crucifixion, death and burial of Jesus Christ. It’s a solemn day marked with services and reenactments of Jesus’s carrying his cross to Calvary. It’s a painful day for many in the Christian faith as they remember the price Jesus had to pay for our sins via his sacrifice on the cross.
The Church teaches about how Jesus died by crucifixion as God poured out Their wrath upon him. This act of Jesus’s crucifixion was the only way to assuage God’s wrath against humanity. This doctrine is known as Penal Substitutionary Atonement (or PSA). I believed in PSA for most of my Christian roadtrip. I believed that Jesus died on my behalf-taking the bullet for me from God so I can be saved. And for a number of years if you told me otherwise, I would have denounced you as a heretic worthy of God’s judgement.
However, as I began to re-review the Passion story and began to hear about God’s love through Their Christ, things began to change. The crucifixion didn’t make sense to me anymore; despite my Pastor (and others’s attempts) to preach this to me.
Today, I see Jesus’s death not due to our sins, rather because of our sins. You have to remember, Jesus was ushering the Divine Realm at a time when Rome ruled Judea (and most of the Western world) with an iron fist. Jesus spoke truth to power which was the unpardonable sin as Rome was concerned. Plus, the high priests and religious elites of the Jewish community were in bed with Pilate-the Roman governor in Judea and wanted to curry favor with him. When Jesus preached against the religious elites and gained popularity with the common folk, the elites had to cook up a scheme to have him tried and killed.
You see, the sins of absolute power, religious institutionalism, and related sins put Jesus on the cross. I don’t believe that Jesus was a sacrifice for our sins to appease an angry god. The PSA schtick was invented later, partly by Paul, and later by Calvin and Luther (who were both attorneys as well as theologians). Plus, why would a God who said that They desired mercy, not sacrifice would turn around and sacrifice Jesus? And why would a God-who forbade human sacrifice-would turn around and sacrifice a human being? Doesn’t make sense.
I know there are many who will disagree with me, and at one time I would have been in the choir with you. However, I grew in my beliefs and realized that PSA didn’t make sense-especially with a God who Jesus preached repeatedly as a God of love and mercy.
Those are my thoughts on Good Friday 2024. You may disagree, or you may agree. I pray that we begin to look at the crucifixion in a new and God-centered light, instead of what the institutional church fed us.
Peace.
Image: Cross at Victory Baptist Church in Bristol, VA. December 24, 2021.
He said to them, “I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer
Luke 22:15 (New Revised Standard Version Updated Edition)
Today is Maundy Thursday, the day we commemorate the Last Supper (as well as Jesus’s betrayed by Judas and ultimate trial. It was from the Last Supper that the ecclesiastical ordinance of Communion (or the Eucharist) came to being. In the Gospels, the Supper was the Passover seder. By the time Paul spoke about the Supper in 1 Corinthians, it was assumed to be a group meal held at the local church. By the time Christianity was institutionalized, the Last Supper became Holy Communion-a periodic ordinance of the Church (frequency dependent on denomination), where matzohs or wafers, and grape juice or wine symbolizing Jesus’s body and blood.
However, today I am going to strip the churchy bits off of the Last Supper and focus on the main topic: communion. Of the definitions of “communion” besides the churchy one, this definition catches my interest: the sharing or exchanging of intimate thoughts and feelings, especially when the exchange is on a mental or spiritual level. Today’s scripture can definitely tie in to this definition of communion. FYI: other related words include: fellowship; community; togetherness; sharing; connection; and unity.
Jesus knew the importance of communion; not the ecclesiastical exclusive ordinance that we can do in our sleep it’s so routine. No, Jesus longed to be with his posse to celebrate the Passover together as close friends and loved ones. This was a time where culture and community was celebrated: both the Jewish tradition and as the family of God. Jesus loved his disciples-even Judas. Jesus wanted to connect with the disciples and share their feelings and thoughts-more than what the scripture recorded. This Passover celebration was a special, yet poignant one since he knew that he would soon be betrayed and turned over to the religious and political elites for trial and execution.
As I inferred earlier, communion has lost its meaning. Today it’s a predictable exclusive ritual that is only for the “saved.” Although there are clergy that try to bring meaning to the ritual, communion has lost its meaning. We took out the spiritual and left the ritual. This is sad, because humans need communion. Does this mean that the Church just serves anyone with the bread and wine? No, that’s a tiny part of it. Let me explain below.
As I said before, we need communion. We need the connectivity where we can be free to be ourselves and share/exchange our intimate thoughts. We oftentimes seek communion in various ways: clubs; social groups; professional organizations; churches, you name it-even in gangs. We seek communion on more intimate levels through sex and romantic relationships. Today’s work from home and remote “gatherings” exacerbate this issue as well as connectivity is virtual instead of in person. Even people like me who enjoy solitude like to have communion in our lives.
The lack of communion as noted above is taking its toll on us as a species. Churches have become members-only ecclesiastical clubs that are dead or dying. Fears of every stripe-real and imaginary-keep us from engaging in communion (that’s a post topic in itself). We find ourselves bereft of communion and will go about settling for cheap forms like excessive social media time, “feel good” churches for an “experience” that quickly fades, investing in groups with time and money and still come up empty, the list is endless…
We need to restore the communion Jesus had-a close fellowship where we can be free to be ourselves as we share our thoughts and feelings with each other. This communion is important for both our spiritual and psychological wellbeing. In a world that is in need of healing, this communion is needed. And if the Church is to remain relevant in the 21st Century, it must get out of the ecclesiastical rut and open up to others, offering the much needed communion.
As we come to the end of Lenten Season 2024, let’s bring communion back to our worship and let true fellowship abide-now and beyond Lent.
Peace!
*Image: Midnight Diner in Charlotte, NC. December 27, 2023.
Hello and a blessed Palm Sunday! Today’s post is a continuation of yesterday’s post.
Today, I’m at church. I didn’t feel like going; however, my wife, Crystal encouraged me to go. Right now, the minister is preaching from Matthew 26 – Jesus’s praying in the Garden of Gethsemane for God to possibly stave off the crucifixion. As the text stated, God didn’t stave it off.
I am glad that I am at worship. Yes, there are other things I could do. However, it can relate to Jesus’s solitude at a dark hour. Carrington’s passing is something that I wish never happened. Every day the awful memory of losing Carrington plays in our minds. It’s that death that drives me to solitude, to my “Garden of Gethsemane.” I too ask God why did this happen, and why did They let it happen. These are questions that still plague Crystal and I; and others who love him.
I know the grief is real. The grief that won’t go away. It is a grief we all feel one time or another in our lives. We may never know the “Why?” yet God knows.
Today’s coming to worship is an indication that grief can be confronted with worship. Our worship, like Jesus’s acceptance of God’s will for his upcoming fate, lets us know that God will always have the final word in our situations. This doesn’t mean that we’ll get over our grief-no. However, God will empower us to get through our grief to that place of peace and blessed assurance.
I pray this post is a blessing-especially those of us who are going through grief. May God continue to bless and comfort us all!
Peace!
Image: Cherry Blossom Trees at Branch Brook Park, Newark, NJ. March 16, 2024.
I am I am in tears right now. I feel as if losing Carrington, God played some cruel joke on my wife and I. Next month would be Carrington’s 16th birthday. He would be getting ready to finish 10th grade and head to 11th grade this fall. However, none of this will happen.
I am sitting in my car, wondering about the future. Not so long ago, when Carrington with us, I thought about the future and started made plans. I did everything and researched financial info so a legacy can be passed to Carrington when Cris and I pass on. However, that’s not the case. Our son is gone and right now lifeis just really nothing.
In the morning, you don’t feel like waking up. I’d rather sleep all day because if I wake up, it’s just one more day reminding me of our loss; reminding me that Carrington is not gonna be there. I wish I could just fall asleep and not wake up.
This is one of the hardest posts I ever had written. Please rest assured I’m not trying to commit suicide or consider it. These are the words of a parent whose heart has a black hole inside of it.
Today I am crying. I feel as if God is not there, and I feel like I said before God played a cruel joke on my wife and I by giving us a son and then set us up to make us think that it would be Carrington who would bury us. No, I feel as if God pulled the punchline and now we buried Carrington. It’s to the point I don’t want to go to church anymore. I don’t want to serve as a deacon anymore. Forget deconstruction, this is demolition and my heart feels this way.
I don’t know how much more I can say. Maybe this was my Lenten journey, so I can open up my heart and tell God how I feel and it’s not pretty. I know God would rather me tell Them some harsh truth than some sugarcoated lies.
If you are there have or are going through what I’m going through, please be rest assured you’re not alone. And whatever you’re feeling, please know those are legitimate feelings; I don’t care what anyone says.
That’s all I can say for now. Now I go and engage the rest of my day the best I can.
Dangerous Christian's Blog 